I bet when Hugh Hefner dies no one will say "He's in a better place now."

Handy tip for new parents: If you want to wake up your baby, rest your head on a pillow.

Keep scrolling, I got nothing.

Honestly, nine times out of ten, when you say "know what I mean?", I don't.

I will probably die of sleep deprivation if Facebook ever adds a dislike button.

The sound of children laughing makes me happy. Unless I'm all alone in a abandoned hospital and my flash-light isn't working properly.